At random :)

Nothing binding in mind, just scattered thoughts rambling like the one they use in Lotto..each excited to get out.

a. STEVE JOBS. I really did not know who he is but I made him and his quote my desktop background before. I did not google his name. I was so unknowing that he was the genius behind many of Apple's success until news about him stepping down from the CEO post gathered too much attention lately. haha. I think he really is a great man :)

b. SPENCER. Its eerie how I am writing this now as my mom and little brother are nursing him since he was so wet from the rain. For how many months now, spencer witnessed the comfort of being indoors again. Wonder what his dog brain might be thinking right now.haha.

c.late night blogging/wee hour blogging--really, I can't blog well if it is not at night.

d. WALKING OUT. I have been walked out on before and I walked out on people too. Its all part of an unending chase, of what wins between pride and concern, of hatred and love, of irritation and conscience and of genuine care and self preservation.

e.THE BETTER MAN. I was watching Cake Boss while eating my 'too late' dinner. Buddy, knowing his temper and his behavior decided to be the better man even when this bridezilla dropped an "are you serious, this is so ugly" comment over his cake and had a tantrum and threw colored fondant all over the pure white bridal cake.

f. THE BETTER MAN 2. I have been trying to be like this but something inside makes it so hard.

g. CS. My dad said "ang mga pinanganak ng CS maiksi ang pasensya compared dun sa normal delivery." I was getting his logic regarding the birth process where the train of thought came from the easier and harder way out. haha. then he began "tignan mo kayo ni paul, madali kayo mainis, di kayo makapaghintay..hahaha." I laughed and in my mind came the words "onga noh" :)

h.SIMPLE HAPPINESS. getting blog comments, well as most of you know is not so common for me and this blog. I just can't believe my eyes when I checked my mail and saw this mail saying one has commented on a post I made. haha. call my crazy and awfully "mababaw" but still, it made me foolishly happy :)

i. the Amaritto Cake. I am not even sure of the name but this cake had been iconic this day. It witnessed the transition from laughter and smiles to upset emotions and unbearable silences. 7pm last night, I received this cake at home, I was hesitant to take it but well, me taking it meant that I appreciated the effort that came with it  at that moment. I still kept my stone wall held up. I fell asleep and woke up to eat..found it on the fridge, took a picture and feelings of guilt came trickling in. I was all about letting my guard down until I took the time to charge my sun phone and read this particular message that made me feel bad again. So yeah, I was on the process of letting my guard down when this one message appeared and held my guard back up.

k. At one point during the day, I was hard up in conditioning myself not to expect. I was doing it for the sake of avoiding that heavy feeling of disappointment. Coming out from that long aisle, I expected to see a familiar face, waiting for me just because it took only a fraction of time to realize that 'she might smile because of this'. All the while I was walking and walking, I was thinking of a person who would be looking for me. I did not expect to be found because that person was not a master of that trade. While some had skill in that area, he has none. I knew I had to go home with the thought that people are people and you can't expect one to react the same way another did when placed in the same situation.

l. DREAM BIG. why? because if that big dream shatters then at least the broken pieces would still be big. I got this from Hearstrings (KDRAMA). though lines like this may go unnoticed by most, to me, it made all the sense in the world.

m. DREAM HIGH. I fell inlove with this drama and I got absorbed too much, it still penetrates my dreams. How I was inspired by Mi's courage and strength, by Jin's self sacrificial actions and coolness, by sam's naive and childlike attitude that won the hearts of many (i just do not know why), by Yoon's actions towards upholding herself despite her many insecurities, by Teacher Kang's wisdom and strong resolve despite his weak disposition, by Teacher Shi's commitment and good heart all disguised by a cunning impression, by Teacher Yang's difficult to hide passion despite his own mental conditionings, by Jason's arrogance and gentlemanliness and by sook's added shine to it all :)

n. If a wall is infront of you, take it down and by then, it becomes a bridge. --Sam Dong ;)

o. The biggest impact of Secret Garden to me is how Joo Won, an obnoxious, conceited young tycoon could actually choose to quietly trade his life for this ordinary stuntwoman who drove him away countless times already.

p. MP. kilig lang tlaga ako dito.haha ;)

q. I got irked at how oily my face looked in that picture. Worse, the image was so define, you could see the oil particles shining from my face. Gawd, was it their moment to shine?? of all places, why my face? and to make it worse, I know all of facebook saw it already even before I did. oh and add a smudged black liner for an extra. haha. the point of asking it to be removed at this time is nil. boinks.

r. "di na ako magpaparamdam". ok. need I say more??

s. Do you actually think I am that stone hearted? If I was then think about how I manage to write my emotions out even if doing that was so uncool?

t. Wo te tsong wen ming tze chiaw yuee ying. Wo te ing wen ming tze chiaw Paola. Sheng re she shuh ee yueh, chio re, ee chio pa chio nien. chin nien er shuh ee swei. Wo tsu chai Fei li pin te Pi Yaw she. Wo te Ti zhe she Trancoville. Wo xi huan te ien se she fen hong se. Pu xi huan she chang se. Wo tswei xi huan Cha chi han mien pao :) I wish I could write this in chinese.haha ;)

u. The rain is falling down hard. It is already 4 in the morning. I am still with my laptop and I am not sleepy. I have too much gas inside my system now and I am at the brink of deciding whether I should sleep or watch something. hai. crazy life.

v. I love this "the suite collection" blanket by Ultimalinen. I really sleep better when I use this. such a comfort to the skin. hehe. recommended :)

w. I randomly opened Charles Swindoll's book and it led me to a passage that I read before with an ending statement that goes "The God of the Bible includes the lives of people who don't get well, who don't quickly get over their problems, who don't easily overcome accidents or illnesses. God's Word pictures its heroes, warts and all. They hurt. They fall. They fail, and on occasion, by His grace, they succeed. How well do you accept the unfolding plan of God for your life?" ----pretty scary right? but what shakes you? for me, it shakes the comfort I have and it stirs my negative and paranoid thinking leading to the shambles in my momentum at this present moment. haaaaay.

x.present desktop wallpaper :)

y. Pics from weheartit ;)

really :)

z. Nam's tears resonated. It felt so real and it reached out beyond the boundaries of "what we only see in movies"